December 02, 2010

Fashion Advice From An Old Handkerchief

Vintage Vixen found this cheeky vintage handkerchief chock full of do's and don'ts for a range of improvable figures. Let's take some fashion advice from an era before the phrase "politically correct" had ever been uttered.

First up, Miss Diminutive. Now that's not so bad (I'm saving the worst for later). A petite gal really could use high heels, though I'm not certain I would make sure all my hats point skyward.

And here's Miss Arrow Slim. She doesn't really translate into a flawed figure today; quite the opposite if you're using the red carpet as your ideal. Surely Hollywood would be red-lighted by this hanky, as "clinging fabrics and decollete" are clearly listed as "don'ts"!

Ah, Miss King Size. Now it's getting a little mean. Though we think the "do" column should substitute a Great Dane for better proportion. But poor Miss King Size is disallowed short skirts and cute bags. For shame!

And last but not least, Miss Jumbo. No kidding. She's relegated to dull fabrics and quiet patterns. No tight dresses or even pants for her! Even this Vixen's pouting for our Miss Jumbo. I think she looks quite the picture in her "don't" profile, bold print and all.

This handkerchief will be posted for sale in a future update. Email for details!

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